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Enjoy!! I know I did
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Moonfaxx of the Exodar glanced at his timepiece, a gift from Kiramaren, and quickly gathered up his tools. The High Tinker had ordered extra security on the tram systems for his birthday celebration and Moon didn’t want to be late. Good mages were never late. Tucking the various tools into pockets and bags he noticed a strange shadow pass over the door of the bank. Curious, he blinked up the ramp to peer around the corner. A bizarre creature moved across the floor, oozing a dark tarry mist as it went. Merchants that it passed stopped talking and sat down or leaned back against their wares, their eyes distant and hopeless. The pink and purple of the Exodar faded grey around the creature. It turned to look at him. “Moonfaxx. My master seeks you. He finds you worthy of joining us.”
Moonfaxx eyed the grotesque mass with distaste. It bubbled and shifted like an unbaked living cake mix. Likely all manner of unsavory bacteria and refuse were embedded in it’s form. “Gross,” he said, and tossed a fireball at it. The resulting charred crust was only slightly less offensive to the eye, but worse to the nose. The chill in the air lifted. Moon shrugged a shoulder, “Fire improves everything.” He began his teleport cast as the voice of the creature whispered, “Moonfaxx, we can make you very powerful. We can provide raiders of the same level of competence as you.”
Moon laughed, “I already have those things!” As he prepped another fireball he noticed a number of deliciously powerful buffs on the sha-thing. “Oooo, SPELLSTEAL ALL THE THINGS!”
As the stolen buffs settled over him, Moon felt a peculiar change. His hands were very warm. He lifted them and stared in surprise as tiny flames licked from his finger tips. “Nice change,” he murmured. The cracked crust of the sha-thing was still. Perhaps he’d killed it now. A voice whispered in his mind, “Welcome to the ranks of the sha, Moonfaxx of the Exodar, you belong to me now.”
That didn’t trouble him nearly as much as it should have.
Em sighed, another day of the same tasks for various factions. Same as yesterday and the day before. Same as everyday since coming to Pandaria. She sorted through her mail. Long-fat, Auction house, Auction house, Auction house, Auction house, Kiramaren.. Oh wait, mail from Kira! Em quickly broke the kitty-paw stamped seal and read the letter.
Dear Emkins,
Moon isn’t answering his mail. In fact, no one in the Exodar is answering mail, and since I’m sure that’s where he is, I’m going there to find him. Can you meet me there? I feel like something is very wrong and I could really use a healer at my back.
Thanks,
Kiramaren
Em groaned. The Exodar, what did Moon see in that place anyway? Bunch of spacegoats that didn’t know they’d been left behind, still trying to sell their wares to the 10 people that get lost there every month. Em checked her flask count and buff foods, “Mmm, steamed crab,” and headed for the portals.
Briefly disoriented by the portal, the first thing she noticed was the cold. The Exodar should never feel cold. A fire crawled across the floor towards her. Startled, she jumped back and scrambled up a stack of crates. The fire meandered around the base of the crates before slipping away down the hall.
“Em! Em, over here!” Kira called from the shadows behind the crate stack.
“Kira, what’s going on? Where’s Moon?” Em scooted down the crate stack and dropped down beside Kira. Her head came only to Kira’s feline shoulder.
“I haven’t looked for him yet. The cold and the fires that crawl around… I thought I should wait for heals.” Kira flicked her whiskers worriedly. “Em, I’m really nervous, this place feels so desperate.”
Em picked a cat hair from her shoulder. “Ya I feel it too. Let’s find him and get the heck outta here, k?”
The two of them crept carefully around the crates and moved towards the center of the Exodar. Kira gasped and whispered, “There he is! What’s happened to him?” Moon was standing at the ledge overlooking the seat of the Naaru. A dark mist emanated from him, like a sinister fog it warped the air. The floor around him steamed and smoked as if it were subject to an intolerable heat. He turned his head slightly towards them and smiled faintly.
“Kirakins.” Moon’s voice was soft, but his eyes were dark and unseeing. His smile chilled them. “I’m pleased to see you. It’s unfortunate for you that the Sha feels you can’t be corrupted. You have some kind of immunity to him. Perhaps you care too much.”
Kira edged forward slightly, “I don’t understand Bum, why is that a bad thing?”
Moonfaxx’s cold smile broadened, “Well Bumkins, it means I have to destroy you of course. But don’t worry, I can make it quick and painless for you.”
Kira cried out, “Don’t worry!? Moon snap out of it! You’d never want to join with the Sha!”
Moon turned to face them. “Oh hai Em. I didn’t see you there hiding behind Kira. It seems that things are unfortunate for you also, the Sha has no use for a warlock that thinks she’s a priest. I won’t torture you or anything but I’m afraid it won’t be as quick as Kira’s. Cool downs, you understand.”
Em let go of Kira’s mane hair and stepped away from her. “Well Moon, if it’s all the same to you I’d rather not. You know you’ve got raid in like, half an hour, so why don’t you just let go of this whole Sha business and get set up?”
The massive meteor sized fireball that streaked towards them might have gotten them both if Kira’s cat reflexes hadn’t kicked in. She snatched Em up by the back of her tunic and raced for the ramp to the exit. Em cast sheilds on them to facilitate their escape. Fist sized balls of flame zipped around the hallway ahead of them and Kira’s dodge skills were sorely tested. The smell of singed fur and hair filled the air as they sprinted out of the Exodar towards the water just beyond the gate. Kira dunked Em. The squelching sound of drenched fire accompanied her own entrance to the water. The two of them stuggled out onto the bank and took stock.
Em grimaced at Kira’s tail, “You lost your tail tassle.”
Kira glanced back at her tail and then eyed Em. “You lost half a pigtail.” She peered up the hill at the Exodar, looming dark and sad before them. “We’re going to need help.”
Em frowned at Kira. “I don’t mean to be the downer here, but it kinda seems like he’s a bit of a lost cause. I mean, he tried to kill us. He tried to kill you Kira! I’d say he’s a bit off his rocker. How are we supposed to take him? He’s got some crazy buffs.”
“Buffs?” Kira said, confused. “What kind of buffs?”
Em shrugged as she picked a water weed from her belt. “I read, ‘Ultimate fire mage’, ‘Doesn’t care about things he should care about’, and ‘Raid boss status’. I couldn’t dispel any of them either.”
“Bizarro.” Kira changed to her Worgen form and began to dig through her bags. “We need Sparty. He’ll know what to do.” She pulled out her portable mailbox and began writing letters. “Guild says he’s on vacation. Something about being on top of a mountain. Dreaz will know how to get in touch with him. I just hope it doesn’t take too long.”
“Right, we take too long he’ll take us all out.” Em grimaced.
“Could you tell how long those buffs might last?” Kira frowned at the sickly fish she found in her bag and tossed it into the water.
“Nah, they looked like spell stolen stuff though. I dunno what he would have stolen them off.”
Kira pulled a letter from her mailbox and nodded decisively. “I’m going to Stormwind to meet with Galvin. He’s got some information from the royal library on the layout of the Exodar we can take advantage of. Maybe we can line of sight Moon somewhere or something, I don’t know. He seems to think it will help.” Kira repacked her things and pulled her hearthstone out. “I’ll see you back here in an hour?”
Em nodded. “Of course. If you think Sparty can help him, I’m game to give it another shot. It’ll be pretty terrible if we lose Moon to the Sha. He makes a terrifying fight. The size of that fireball,” Em shuddered. “I hate getting burned.”
“Oh, for sure.” Kira replied distractedly. She stared again at the Exodar, the hearth stone hanging forgotten in her hand. “Em, if we can’t get him back, we have to destroy him. No way we can let the Sha have him.”
“Can we destroy him, Kira?”
“I don’t know, Em. He’s gotten pretty strong with those buffs. I’m hoping we can just talk sense into him when Sparty gets here. He’ll listen to Sparty. I’ll be back soon.” Kira began the cast off her hearthstone.
“Hey Kira,” Em said, “just in case we can’t talk sense, bring friends. You know, anyone that doesn’t want to see Moon as the next end raid boss.”
“Ya, shouldn’t be hard to find some people.” Kira vanished in a green flash of hearthstone cast and Em was left alone.
Em started up the path to Azure Watch. She wanted dry clothes. Maybe some of the people at the watch would give them a hand. Someone else for Moon to burn while they ‘talked’.
Kira returned to the place she’d left Em to find several groups of elite guards from Azure Watch and a familiar gnome directing the groups to stations within the Exodar. “…and don’t stand in fire.” Em was saying as Kira approached. “Hey Kira! I found some reinforcements!”
“Oh that’s great!” Kira said, without any real enthusiasum.
“Where’s Sparty?” Em asked, glancing around. “Where are the people you said shouldn’t be a problem to bring?”
“Sha of Anger is up, they thought it might weaken the Sha hold on Moon if they took him down. They’ll be here in a little bit. Sparty is on his way down, according to Dreaz.” Kira sat down and began sorting through her bag. “Here, I’ve got a map of Exodar that Galvin gave me. He thinks we should kite Moon through The Trader’s Tier, The Vault of Lights and then The Crystal Hall. We might be in trouble if we have to run across the central area to do it again, he’ll have a clear shot at us on the way through.” Kira frowned at the map and chewed her lower lip.
Em studied the map. “Kira, what makes you think Moon will kite like a boss? He’s smart, what if he just runs around and cuts us off? He’s got freaking minions in there, he can box us in from two sides in The Trader’s Tier.”
“Oh that’s right, Galv said that too. Sorry, I’m feeling a little scatter brained. Migraine. We’ll start in The Crystal Hall and then go to the Vault of Lights.” Kira looked up with relief as the first of the Death Jesters moved towards them from the dock. Her eyes hunted among them. “No Sparty.”
Em pointed at a familiar face, “I see Towelliee.” Towelliee grinned, his furry face splitting in a toothy smile.
“Moonfaxx raid, kegs up!”
“Ya,” said Kira, “and there’s Blacksaw, Arrel, Oaf, Clouds, Vlatos, Thorgalls and Clarendon too. There’s a bunch more on the way, they should be here soon.”
“Aren’t some of those people retired?” Em watched in awe as the Death Jesters crowded around the map to talk strategy.
“Well technically yes, but this isn’t really an official raid. Plus, when a DJ is in trouble, the rest follow shortly.” Kira waved at Clarendon as the group moved towards them.
Clarendon reached up and snatched the map from Arrell. “Gimme that you babbling brook!” He shook out the map and grinned at it. “This is great. We get to nuke Moonfaxx into next expansion!”
“What?! No!,” Kira exclaimed and plucked the map from Clarendon’s tiny grasp. “We’re talking to him first, no nuking!”
“I like your faith Kira, but he’s a little scary to chat with at the moment.” Em tugged at Kira’s tail. “I was there.” The ground rumbled suddenly and the Exodar belched forth a foul sulphur from it’s entrances.
Clarendon brushed off his clothes as he got to his feet. “Not sure, but I don’t think chatting is high on Moon’s priorities right now.” He scowled at a patch of mud on the fine fabric of his robe. “Oh, it’s on now.” He shook his little fist at the Exodar, “You’re going down Noofmaxx!” As Clarendon rushed forward on stubby (but finely clothed) legs, the rest of the DJ’s charged for the main entrance.
“Great,” Kira growled as she shifted to her stag form, “get on Em, we have to get there before they start attacking.” She lowered her head enough for Em to grasp a horn and tossed her up. The ride into the Exodar was filled with smoke and shouting, buffs were thrown as the first of Moonfaxx’s minions raced up the ramp at them. Burning masses of sha-like creatures rolled over the ground leaving trails of fire and black smear. Kira vaulted over them and raced on, Em’s shield protecting them from the volleys of fireballs the size of a pally tanks head. Em glanced back at the receding fight as Thorgalls and Towelliee charged in, fearless and heedless of bodily harm. A flickering red and orange light bathed the walls of the ramp as they loped farther down into the Exodar. Em’s hands gripped Kira’s harness tighter as they reached the bottom of the ramp and discovered the source of the light. The Seat of the Naaru was filled with a huge roaring fire extending high into the peaks of the ceiling of the Exodar. Moonfaxx stood before it, facing it with his hands extended from his sides, face turned upwards and eyes closed.
“Kira, Em, I’m so glad you returned. Saves me the trouble of hunting you down. Most difficult to ensure you quick deaths while I’m burning the world.”
Em slid down Kira’s side and ducked behind a crate stack. Kira shifted into her Worgen form. “Moon please,” she pleaded. “Just come back with us. We don’t have to do this. No one has to be destroyed.”
Moon lifted his hands and held them out to Kira. “Look Kira, I’m made of fire! Can you give me that? I can cleanse the whole world! All I have to do is destroy everything…”
Kira let tears fall, “No, bumkins, this isn’t you. You have to see that, you have to know that!”
“Kira, move!” Em shouted and threw herself against Kira’s legs as fire roared past them. Hair fell down around her face as the last of the burnt pigtail was singed away. “You can’t save him,” she hissed at Kira as they ducked around a pillar. “He’s not himself, and he wants us dead! Not just you and me, but the whole world! You heard him, he’s going to destroy everything!”
Death Jesters were gathering at the foot of the ramp, out of Moon’s line of sight for the moment. Em squinted at them. “What are they doing, Kira?”
Kira glanced at them. “They’re getting ready for the pull, Em. They’re getting ready to destroy Moon.” From directly behind them Moon laughed. Em bolted to her feet and fled around the next pillar, Kira close on her heels. “Oh, come on. You can’t take me. Not even an entire raid can take me now! Let me show you what I can do!” Lashes of fire burst from him, striking the ground all around in a large circle. Gnome sized flame elementals sprang from each lash, hundreds of them drifting forward to the raid of Death Jesters. From her hiding place Em sprang out and attempted a mass dispel over Moon.
“Oh, that’s cute Em. I’m afraid you lack the necessary skill for it though.” With a flick of his wrist a wave of super heated air hurled Em through the first archway of the Trade Tier. Em frantically cast levitate as she sailed over the floor and took a shakey breath as she gently bounced to a stop near the pathway through to the Vault of Lights. Kira shifted into stag and snatched Em up with a horn through her belt, her hooves ringing on the metal floor as she ran. Em caught sight of the raid being pushed back into the Crystal Hall. She twisted around to look down into Kira’s eyes as she dangled from her antlers.
“Kira, we can meet up with the raid as they clean up those elementals in the Cyrstal Hall. I know you don’t want to put him down, but I really insist at this point we haven’t got a choice.” Kira said nothing as she sprinted through the Vault of Lights, various fire spells sliding over the chain cast shields and Spirit shells. She leapt over the heads of the raid as they crowded towards the path between the Vault of Lights and the Crystal Hall. She shifted from Stag to Worgen, dropping Em to the floor and sending her tumbling into a mage table. “Block the pathway!” She shouted.
“I’m on it!” Henzington shouted back. He blinked across to the doorway and promptly ice blocked.
Em plucked a danish from her head and tossed it aside. “I don’t think that’s going to work for long,” she commented. Moonfaxx strode up to within feet of the Henzcicle and smiled into Henz’s frozen face.
“Very nice. Yes, …hmm.” He stepped back and began to cast, the fire on his hands flaring to new brillance. Horrible tense seconds ticked by and then Moon snatched his hands forward and shattered the block of ice. Henz hurtled over them at blinding speed and then was yanked from the air by a well timed life grip of Vlatos, a second before he would have struck the wall. Shaken, but not routed, the raid drew close around their healers, the tanks easing forward with grim determination etched on their faces.
Moonfaxx broadened his eerie smile and swept his flaming hands through the air. Fire roared to life all around them, sealing all exits. With each gesture new fire rose closer to the raid, and Moon began to hum happily. Watching the fire crowd in closer at the rear of the raid, Em noticed a paladin striding through the flames, his bubble protecting him. “Kira,” she gasped, “is that Sparty?”
The paladin marched through the raid, and cast hammer of justice on Moonfaxx, sending him to his knees. “Why didn’t anyone dispel him? Jackelopes.”
“Sparty!” Kira cried out happily.
Em followed Kira to the front of the raid where everyone was crowding around the stunned Moonfaxx. “Well it wasn’t for lack of trying ya know,” she said, and then shrank back from Sparty’s gaze as he peered down at her. “The dispel I mean,” she murmured.
Sparty cast a few quick cleanses and Moon began to look more like himself. Kira put her hand on Moon’s shoulder and peered into his face, “Moon?”
Clarendon slotted his way through the forest of legs surrounding them, “Here I got this.” He said, “Hey Noofmaxx, who am I?”
Moon smiled a wisp of a smile, “Darenclon.”
Clarendon rolled his eyes. “Ya, he’s fine.”
“Well, that was somewhat fun.” Sparty said. He took a quick glance around. “Raid in 10 minutes. Henz! Get us a port outta here.”
Henz began casting a portal.
“Syryana! I want a healthstone in everyone’s left pocket.” Sparty turned to glare at an applicant, “Your other left you window licker!” He stepped through the portal, his voice carrying through from the other side as he strode purposefully away, “I swear, can’t be gone 24 hours before the Sha starts poaching my raiders. Jackelopes! Moonfaxx! You‘ve got 6 minutes to get to the Hear of Fear before I replace you! If you can‘t, there are plenty of others that can!”
Em looked up at Galvin as he returned his weapons to his back. “Business as usual then?”
Galvin grinned, “Nothing phases Sparty. Not even a Sha-delusional Moonfaxx.”
Moon got to his feet. “Guess we better get to raid. Thanks for sticking around Em.”
Em stuck her tongue out at him. “It’s Kira you should be thanking, she never gave up on you.”
“Naturally.” Moon said and grinned at Kira as she stepped through the portal ahead of him. “See you around, Em.” He stepped through and the portal closed, leaving Em alone in the Exodar.
She reached up to finger the singed fringes of her hair and then began hunting through her bag for her hearthstone. “Left me in the Exodar. Guess the joke is on me.”